Twas Brillig

1.  THOMASES DON’T KNOW HOW TO BLOG

My family, as in, my parents and siblings, have a lot in common.  They are highly intelligent, gorgeous (natch), and adventurous.  They always have great stories to tell.  However, another thing they have in common is that they’re ROTTEN at keeping in touch.  So I came up with this brilliant idea that I would start a family blog.  Everyone is assigned one day of the week to post.  My parents would take one day, and then each of us six kids and our families would take the other six days.  Hahaha.  Let the hilarity commence.  Teaching my family how to blog has been QUITE the adventure!  We got the whole thing all set up over the weekend and then I posted on my day (we’re going youngest to oldest, and since I’m the youngest, I post on Mondays).  You’ll be happy to know that it is now Wednesday and the ONLY post on the family blog in mine.

It’s not just the posting that’s complicated— it’s the setting up a gmail account (we’re using Blogger, because I figured it would be easier for novices), signing in to the blog, and even COMMENTING that have been the real drama here.  Wow.  Who knew this would be so difficult?  I thought it would be a fun, easy way for us to stay in touch and keep a conversation going.  Apparently I was wrong!  Hahaha.  Fortunately I have one sister, the oldest, who will not be letting me down.  She knows how to blog.  So I guess there will be posts every Saturday and Monday.  Anyway, this is one project that has taken immense amounts of time.

But before I leave this subject, I really HAVE to show you the photo that I turned into the banner for our new blog:

I’m the little pipsqueak in the front.  I must have been about 4 years old here, so I guess the photo is from 26 years ago.  And no, I haven’t stopped giggling about my brother Chris’s shorts…

2.  MAD MAX!

We found the puppy of our dreams!  It was almost miraculous the way it all worked out.  Max is a 7-week old purebred golden retriever. He is our pride and joy! Max isn’t just our new family member, but he has a job to do, too! He was specifically chosen to be a therapy dog for Isaac. Golden retrievers make excellent therapy dogs and are particularly tuned in to children with autism. And Isaac has already proven to us that he connects emotionally with animals in a way he is not yet capable of connecting with people.

However, once again, what I hadn’t taken into account was just how much time and energy puppies require!  I thought I was all prepared to mother a puppy.  But somehow I didn’t quite realize that I would be up all day and all night with him.  Somehow I didn’t realize that puppies pee THAT FREQUENTLY.  Somehow I didn’t realize that my younger children need to be supervised every second that they’re near him.  Wow.  This is exhausting.  But!  Don’t let my whining fool you.  I LOVE THIS DOGGY!  He’s like one of my own babies.

3.    Swimming and Ballet and Piano, oh my!

I feel overrun by my children’s extracurricular activities.  It’s funny, because I’d really wanted to get them into soccer and basketball this season too, but didn’t because all of it together would have cost too much money.  But now?  HA!  Forget the money, it’s TIME that I’ve run out of!  This is another one of those mom things that they don’t really tell you about.   You see the photos of the soccer moms with their hair all perfect and their cute little outfits, cheering their children on from the sidelines.  LIES!   We’re really a bunch of haggard, exhausted women who consider their hair “done” when it’s halfway falling out of a scrunchy left over from the 90’s and consider themselves “dressed” when their sweats sorta match.  There ain’t NOTHIN’ glamorous about it!  Because, see, WE DON’T HAVE TIME TO SHOWER!

4.  Crack(ed glass up your nose) is Whack

So, I have a beautiful bathtub.  It’s surrounded by tile, with ledges at the head and foot for me to put things like pretty candles.  I have a gorgeous, gigantic glass-and-iron candlestick on one of the ledges.

And I usually keep the door locked, because Isaac is a menace to society and completely undisciplinable.  So as much as I love to find my make-up and lotion spilled all over the place and crayon scribbled all over my shower, I try to keep it locked.

Apparently, the other day, it wasn’t locked.

He knocked the candle into the bathtub and it shattered glass everywhere.  Of COURSE, being the selfish brat that I am, the first thing I thought was, dang!  I liked that candlestick!!  Then I started to remember that I’m a MOM, so finally I wondered if Isaac had been hurt by all the shattered glass.  But I couldn’t find any evidence of cuts or anything, so I moved on.

Half an hour later, his arm is covered in blood.  I clean it up, but I can’t find a cut.  Blood is coming from SOMEWHERE, but where?

And then I find it.  His nose.  There is glass stuck up his NOSE and he’s bleeding but wiping it away, so I hadn’t seen the blood there yet.  And I can’t get him to sit still long enough for me to get the glass out of his nose.  Oh my gosh, I’m dying here.  This is just so… so…  ISAAC!  And I have to remember that just because Isaac doesn’t EXPRESS pain doesn’t mean that he doesn’t FEEL it.  I’m sure he was in a whole lot of pain.  I mean, imagine if there were glass digging into the flesh inside YOUR nostril?  Yeah… that would hurt.

But there was not a single tear coming out of his eyes.

So, we ended up at the doctor’s office.  I had Bubba and Scooby with me too, so that was fun.  It’s interesting, because looking back, I realize that Bubba and Scooby were traumatized by the whole thing too.  There we were, in a miniscule exam room, while the doctor was poking and prodding at Isaac’s nose while I held him down.  Isaac was screaming his brains out (more due to being poked and held rather than about the pain) and blood was GUSHING from his nose like a fountain, drenching me and the floor.  And because of their trauma, Scooby and Bubba were acting out WAY more than I expected them to.

But, the doctor got it all figured out and Isaac was sent home “cured” though we were told to expect lots of vomiting, due to the TONS AND TONS of blood that the kid had likely swallowed.  But, yay!  No vomiting!  How’s THAT for a silver lining?

5.   Too much cool stuff in Bloglandia!

I get these ideas of games I want to play, contests I want to enter, and posts I want to write in response to others’ posts.  It’s overwhelming!  And, of course, instead of doing ANYTHING, I just sorta hide out and do NOTHING!  Still, this week I really think I’d like to enter Discovering Dad’s Adventure of a Lifetime contest (the question is, how do I pick just one adventure?  There are so many!  Any suggestions?  Are you playing too?) so look for that tomorrow… or soon.  haha.  And I WILL be playing Soap Opera Sunday this week (hosted this month by 2 Hearts) because I remembered that I DO actually have a “long-distance relationship” SOS to share!  Still, that only scratches the surface of the games I want to play along with.  I’m pretty much hiding from the rest— and not commenting anywhere, despite the fact that I’ve read a lot of your posts…  Cuz I stink like that.  WHY are any of you people still tolerating me?!

In the meantime, think of me cleaning up poop (thanks to all the various creatures that manage to get poop on my rug) (you can call me “Anniepooperscooper” the way my family does) and hopefully I’ll see you soon!

I miss you!