Twas Brillig

Dear Daddy,

Thank you so much for letting us live in your house while you and Mom are in Spain. It means the world to us.

So far, we have had a wonderful experience. The neighbors are, in general, kind to us. Though I think that they might possibly be suspicious of me, ever since Bubba peed on the neighbor’s front porch. Or after Scooby was found standing in the middle of a very busy nearby street screaming, “MOMMY!” (I thought he was downstairs playing with his trains) and was escorted home by a complete stranger. And that then there was that time that I dropped Fuzzles in front of the whole congregation at church. I hope none of this has tarnished your perfect name.

Your house has suited us well. Fluffy and Fuzzles are sharing my old bedroom. It has never been anything but an atrocious mess since the day we moved in. Like mother, like daughter, huh? And Scooby and Bubba share J’s old bedroom. While it looks spotless compared to Fluffy’s room, it smells… well… like a boy’s room. I don’t know why that is. It looks clean, but it stinks like boy. So, pretty much just how it was when J lived there, I guess.

I confess that there have been one or two casualties. While we have tried very hard to limit food-consumption to the kitchen area, as per your request, there have been one or two occasions where someone managed to slip out of my site. Let’s just say that it’s a good thing that the futon in the family room was already approximately the color of grape juice… Also, just today I discovered a caramel-filled Hershey’s Kiss was smashed and stepped on repeatedly, and ground into your insanely expensive Persian rug in Mom’s study. Needless to say, I have no idea how to remove it. However, in true Scarlet O’Hara fashion, I choose to worry about it tomorrow. I can’t bear to think of it tonight. So, for now, I’ve covered it with a chair

Then, of course, there’s the hotwheel car wedged into your priceless baby grand piano. I haven’t yet taken the piano apart, because the thought of it kinda makes me hyperventilate.

And… um… this morning, while I was doing ten thousand loads of laundry, because that’s how much laundry my household generates every day, Hubby walked into the washroom and yelled, “SWEETY!!! I THINK THERE’S A FIRE IN HERE!”

The good news is, there was no fire. The bad news is, we burned out a motor in your washing machine.

So, I figure we now owe you approximately four million dollars. Good thing I’m making millions of dollars off of this blog every week… Oh, wait…

I guess it’s a good thing that I was such a rotten teenager, and that you learned immense amounts of patience and forgiveness during those years…

Don’t worry.  It’s just for one more year.  Daddy?  Daddy?  Are you all right?

Love,

Brill-Brill